10 Good Ideas to Co-Parent Better and Help Your Children Adapt and Cope: This Week 4-6

Unless the other parent is a truly dangerous person (and by dangerous we mean drug addict, violent, and endangering to the children etc.)

4. Do not ask your children. In most circumstances children love both parents, unless and until divorce hits. When divorce hits, they are expected to love their parents in accordance with the needs of their parents. This is heartbreaking for children, literally, and the impact is forever lasting. Children live happy, more productive lives when they are nurtured consistently and chaos is not the normal.

5. Show the other parent how you do it: Often times one parent has more experience parenting. That parent should show the other parent what routine works for them and if appropriate, how to feed and put a child to bed or nap. With this, one can try to assure a child has consistency in both homes, and the ability to enjoy being with the other parent. Withholding parenting knowledge only harms the child.

6. Custodial exchanges should be at the end of the school day. For example, the custodial parent would drops off to school in the morning, and the other parent’s custody commences with pickup from school, that same day. Custodial exchanges are an extremely stressful event for (child)ren, regardless of how well their parents think they are behaving during the exchanges. If the child(ren) know their parents will not see each other, the anxiety of the children is greatly reduced. If this is not an option, then exchanges should be curbside, where a child(ren) will go from one vehicle to the house of the other, or public location, without parental interaction. Build a history with the child(ren) so they rely on chaos free exchanges.


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